Living with a Child with Cerebral Palsy: a Story of Katie and Me

I am guessing if you are reading this article you eitherbe focusing a lot of time on helping this person. Katie
have child with Cerebral Palsy or know someone whocould not walk by herself until she was eight years old.
has this condition. If you do not know what CerebralBut my wife and I decide we would not put her in a
Palsy is, I will tell you in layman's terms. It means brainwheelchair if she could at least walk with help. They
damage. The damage can be either so minor that it ishave a therapy called Conductive Education. We sent
hardly noticeable or it can be severe mental andher to Canada three times for five-week courses. We
physical damage. My daughter was born with Cerebralactually raised the money to send her, and for us to
Palsy because while in the womb, her intestine twistedstay with her, by holding garage sales. We would hold
causing my wife and her to be under stress. Katie hadone every weekend in different locations for two to
six strokes before she was born. The damagethree months. We would tell people the garage sale
caused her to be partially paralyzed on the left side ofmoney was being used to help Katie get to the camp.
her body.Do you know that people would bring us stuff to sell or
Now this article is about how my wife and I dealt withtell us to come by and pick up stuff. You may not
raising her. Recently, I joined a personal developmentbelieve this, but I had a sixteen-foot horse trailer loaded
website. As I have been listening and watching someup when I got ready to have the sale. By the end of
of the audios and videos, I have realized that some ofthe sale, we were restocked with new items. Also,
the virtues taught, we have been doing for years. Wesometimes people would donate money. My wife, our
have just not had any training. Probably like yourself,family members and I were willing raise the money to
we had some of these qualities, but did not know howget her to the camp. Remember, "Where the
to harness or exploit them.willingness is great the difficulties cannot be great."
The first feelings we had were uncertainty for thesays Niccolo Machiavelli
future. We were both young. But really, no one is everNow, the most important thing I have learned in my life
ready for anything like this. At first, no one would tell uswith Katie is never give up. Now I understand that not
what was wrong or what to do. All we could thinkeveryone has the same circumstance, but set goals.
was we had the worst situation ever. We did notSomething always told me that she could walk. Now I
know if it was a freak accident or genetic. Would thisknew she would not walk perfect, but she would walk.
affect any other children we had? But after the shockAnd through her efforts and the effort of my wife,
wore off, we realized God had blessed us. Otherothers, and me, she can walk. We also knew she
babies in the intensive nursery weighted around 2 lbs.needed an education like the other kids, so we
Our Katie weighted over 6 lbs. She stayed in therequired her to do the same as other kids. It always
hospital for 51 days. We were told at the beginningtook her longer to do everything. But she has ended
that she would be in the intensive nursery for possiblyup graduating early and is now in college working on a
6 months.degree in accounting. We are still helping her adjust. But
From this uncertainty of the future, my wife and Iour goal is for her to be as independent as she
learned our first lesson when dealing with apossibly can. Do not hide the person. Try to include
handicapped child, which was to realize how blessedthem in everything you do. We always took our
we were. We had family members who had helpeddaughter out in public. When she was in school, we
us get through the initial shock. I had a good job withpushed her to do her best. Ruth Gordon once said,
insurance that paid almost all of the medical expenses."Never give up and never face the facts."
Our child was alive. You really do not understand howI believe that when facing the challenges of dealing
strong you are until something like this happens. All youwith a Cerebral Palsy person or any person with a
can really do is try to take care of the moment.handicap, there are three things to remember that can
Abraham Lincoln once said "The best thing about thehelp you through. First, realize when the uncertainty of
future is that it comes only one day at a time."the future overwhelms you, that you have family and
The next thing we learned was to make afriend to support and help you through these trying
commitment to our child. A quote I enjoy by Mariantimes. If you are the one helping the handicap person,
Wright Edelman goes like this, "You are not obligatedyou will need to make a commitment and be willing to
to win. You are obligated to keep trying to do the bestgo the distance. And last, but most important, never
you can every day." It was almost a year beforegive up. There are going to be times when you want
anyone would tell us she had Cerebral Palsy. Weto throw in the towel. Take a step back, and grab a
knew something was wrong, but did not know what itbreath. Think about what Booker T. Washington once
was. She was not doing the things that normal babiessaid, "Success is to be measured not so much by the
could do. After we were told she had Cerebral Palsy,position that one has reached in life as by the
my wife and I had to make a commitment to Katieobstacles which he has overcome." I am a firm
that we would do whatever we needed to do to helpbeliever that God does not give a person more than
her function in a "normal" world. We could hide herthey can handle. If you are a parent of a Cerebral
from the world or treat her like our other children. WePalsy child, God has given you a special gift. He has
chose to do the best we could to help her.entrusted you a special person. Do not be afraid to
After you make the commitment, you have to bepray. Sometimes that may be the only thing that will
willing to follow through. You are going to be theget you through the hard times.
person taking them to the doctors. You are going to