How to Help Children With Autism to Integrate With Others

How can we help our children with autism fit in withdates when younger, and help your child learn how to
other kids?use the phone to invite another child over.  By doing
As parents, it can break our hearts when we see ourthis on a regular basis, you can help your child
child with autism struggle with feeling different.  Oftenappreciate her friend/s.
children with autism may end up avoiding socialIt's best to begin with one-on-one interactions, since
situations altogether because of the challenges oftriads (three or more kids) can be very confusing for
decoding social signals.  In addition, the noises, sounds,your child.
and smells of those around them may be too muchTake Time to Teach: Before, During, and After
for them from a sensory standpoint.  Finally, they mayIt's not always easy, but you are your child's best
have episodes of being bullied, and thus are afraid toadvocate and teacher.  In as non-intrusive a way as
deal with any more social situations.possible, talk with your child about what a good friend
Deal With Your Own Thoughts and Feelings Aboutis like.  You may want to check your local library for
Your Child With Autismkids' books that talk about and teach friendship in a
Sometimes, we are unaware of the depth of thoughtstory.  This will hep prepare your child for the concept
and emotion we have with our child. We may be inof friendship.
denial of his/her differences.  We may unconsciouslyDuring the play date, you may need to intervene if you
be angry that they are not like neurotypical children,see really inappropriate behaviors, or if you see that
and we may be trying to make them be someoneyour child is not very engaged.
they aren't. We may be either overly focused on theirAfter the play date, you can talk with your child about
weaknesses.how the time went, and discuss what went well, and
Make sure, as a parent, that you take the time to readwhat can be done differently.
autobiographies of children, teenagers, and adults onRealize That Your Child May Truly Enjoy and Need
the autism spectrum.  Watch TV shows and moviesTime Alone
that portray Aspergers and Autism in a realistic, yetBeing alone is not the worst thing in the world.  In fact,
positive light.  Go on YouTube, for example, and viewindividuals on the autism spectrum are often mystified
the videos that Taylor Morris has put out.  As parents,by how desperately NT's seem to want to connect
teachers, friends of individuals with autism, we need towith each other. Time alone in between time with
give them the respect of understanding what autismfriends allows your child to explore his/her interests, be
spectrum is, and respecting the differences, strengths,away from distracting sounds and lights, and in his/her
and challenges.own comfort zone, which would usually be his/her
Once You Have Learned All About Autism, Teachroom or home.
Your Child About His/Her StrengthsResearch Helpful Social Skill Materials and Share
It's absolutely paramount that you let your child knowThem With the School Social Worker
how unique s/he is.  Learn about his/her specialSchool social workers have limited time, but they can
talents, interests, and abilities.  Help him find activities inbe very helpful in helping your child on the autism
which he can participate, which can help him learnspectrum learn appropriate social skills.  If you are
more and build on those strengths.  Once your child isinvolved in your child's individualized education planning, I
involved in some of these activities, she may find outwould suggest that you look up Michelle Garcia Winner
that she connects with other kids with those sameon the internet.  All her material on social thinking is
interests.invaluable, and is written with teachers in mind, so that
Start Off Smallthese social skills can be literally written into your child's
Be on the lookout for other kids in your child's classindividualized education plan.  She writes in a way that
who may have connected with him/her.  There areeducators can understand, so that social and emotional
some special kids out there (NT's) who are genuinelyintelligence can be broken down into goals and
nice, extroverted kids, and they will often serve as aobjectives for your child.
kind of social buddy and friend to your child.  BeI hope these tips come in helpful for you.
proactive about getting your child together for play