| In the last couple of years I have written a lot of | | | | can always go in any direction. Some conversations |
| articles and a special report to tell people how they | | | | work well, and some don’t. |
| can improve their small talk and conversations skills. | | | | I realized that making conversation is not a science, |
| Quite often, I get compliments from people who tell me | | | | with any rigid formulas. Making conversation is more |
| that my articles on making conversation have helped | | | | like an art form. Because making conversation is an |
| them a lot. However, I also get a lot of complaints | | | | art form and not a science, you can be creative when |
| from people about my articles on making conversation. | | | | you make conversation. Like any art form, you can |
| The main complaints I get about my conversation | | | | increase your skill with practice. Like any art form, |
| articles goes something like this: “ I read this article | | | | when you make conversation, you can throw out all |
| about conversation because I thought it was going to | | | | the rules. |
| tell me exactly what to say to people. Now I am | | | | Just like there isn’t any formula for how you should |
| disappointed because the author didn’t tell me | | | | dance or how you should paint, there isn’t any real |
| exactly what to say.” | | | | formula for how you make conversation.You don’t |
| I can sympathize with these people who complain | | | | want to reveal everything about yourself to |
| because I used to feel that way too. I was | | | | everybody. You have to spend time looking around |
| tremendously shy and awkward whenever I had to | | | | for the people you really want to talk with and to |
| talk to people. I thought that everything I said was | | | | spend time with. |
| stupid and the wrong thing. I thought there must be | | | | Here is another reason why you can’t really have |
| some secret formula for how you talk to people, and | | | | a formula for making conversation. |
| that every body in the world knew how to talk to | | | | In a conversation, you are only responsible for 50 % of |
| people except me. | | | | the talking. People who are very worried about |
| So, I spent many years trying to learn how to | | | | finding the secret formula for making conversation, |
| overcome my shyness and learn the secrets of | | | | often forget that one of the most important parts of a |
| making conversation with other people. I kept looking | | | | conversation is to listen. You can get so focused |
| for that magic conversation formula that would tell me | | | | on what you are going to say next, that you totally |
| exactly what to say to people. | | | | forget to do the listening part. Really listen. |
| And guess what? There is no secret formula. | | | | Listen with open ears and an open mind and an open |
| I realize now that looking for a formula for talking to | | | | heart. That will take you further than any simple |
| people is a mistake. I repeat again, there is no | | | | formula about what you should say. |
| formula for making conversation! | | | | This article was written by Royane Real, author of the |
| A conversation is simply two people making an | | | | special report “Your Guide to Making Friendly |
| exchange of words, ideas, opinions, feelings or facts. | | | | Conversation” Learn more ways to improve your |
| No two conversations are ever alike. Conversations | | | | conversation skills. |